Embracing church, finding healing

Sally Sullivan

Adapted from the Church Alive website under the title “Restrictions and resistance dissolved.”

Most of my family attended a Christian Science church when I was a child. My mom and I read the weekly Bible Lesson together, and I loved the Bible stories. Even as a child, I loved Mary Baker Eddy’s use of language in Science and Health. Yet I resisted church attendance much as I resisted a lot of things my family did—claiming my independence and self-reliance. Christian Science seemed too restrictive and weird, and I felt it set me apart from friends who went to more mainstream churches. I really wasn’t practicing Christian Science even though I was reluctantly attending church with my family.

In college, feeling even more empowered and independent, I decided I didn’t need that kind of structure in my life at all. So I severed all contact with church, including withdrawing my membership in The Mother Church.

But my life did not go well health-wise. I’d had skin rashes as a child and teenager, and after marriage, skin problems, food allergies, and other health issues worsened. I began reading self-help books on biochemistry and taking food supplements, thinking I had to manage the nutrients my body received. Soon my cupboards were full of supplements, not food. I became pretty much addicted to these. I increasingly feared food and its effects.

One day, as I was considering for the umpteenth time what I could and couldn’t eat at my next meal, and feeling the limitations of these restrictions, an idea permeated my thought: God must have something better in mind for me than this pathetic, self-defeating existence. I had just driven past a Christian Science church and Reading Room, which I had driven by and walked by for years. But this time a spiritual intuition led me to turn my car around and go into the Reading Room.

The attendant greeted me warmly. I don’t remember much of what we talked about, but I do remember feeling that here was someone who cared about me. The attendant suggested I get a copy of The Christian Science Journal and look for a practitioner in the directory. I left feeling lighter than air. That evening I called a practitioner. And that began my journey out of fear and restriction. It felt right to throw out all my supplements, and I went through the house with a big green trash bag, cleaning out all my reading materials on food chemistry, and diet.

Immediately I began attending church and applied for membership after a few months. The church had a waiting period of one year, but the board waived the requirement and I joined within six months. During that time, I also applied for reinstatement as a member of The Mother Church, and for Christian Science class instruction.

I was thrilled with my new status as a branch church member. I had never joined any organization since graduating from college, and this was a whole new experience. I couldn’t believe how welcomed I felt, how much I loved participating, how good it felt to support church as a way of supporting my community, as well as being supported myself. I signed up for every position available, and reveled in the joy of church participation. Gone was the desire to express independence through separation, and the feeling that I didn’t need a spiritual base. I clearly recognized that there was freedom in structure, and that I needed this involvement and activity to feel fully myself. What a revelation!

The physical issues were gradually fading, too, and I gave a testimony every week about the healings I was having. My fellow church members listened, supported, and encouraged me in my spiritual progress. I came to see that giving gratitude during Wednesday testimony meetings was an active part of gaining dominion over my body. I was willing to let go of this picture of myself as a suffering mortal. To me, testifying is an important step in recognizing complete freedom from a complaint. Leaving my struggle behind was priceless.

A statement on p. 162 of Science and Health was a clarion call: “The effect of this Science is to stir the human mind to a change of base, on which it may yield to the harmony of the divine Mind.” Coming into harmony with Spirit encapsulates what was happening. This sentence became a living, vital expression of what was occurring for me.

My journey to freedom took a while, but many blessings were experienced along the way. Relationships with family members improved dramatically. My joy in life’s possibilities increased. The most important relationship with my divine Father-Mother God took on a profound sweetness. And, gratefully, I have been completely free of skin problems and food allergies for many years. Today, I also feel God’s blessings and love in my new-found career as a Journal-listed Christian Science practitioner.

Sally Sullivan
Indianapolis, Indiana, US

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