It all started out pretty harmlessly. I had a newly furnished cottage, and I wanted to supplement its decorations with things bought at rock-bottom prices at thrift stores. But then, after the cottage was completely furnished, I couldn't stop shopping.

I remember having a nagging feeling that what I was doing wasn't right, but I suppressed those inklings. I was influenced by certain "enabling arguments" about frugality, recycling on behalf of the environment, and finding collectibles and treasures, all of which justified my habitual spending. These rationalizing thoughts were like bad company I was keeping. And my innocent desire to find bargains became a full-blown addiction to shopping in thrift stores.

But then one day I was at a thrift store where there was a long line. I was feeling frustrated and unhappy because of the wait, and because by that point shopping at thrift stores was a compulsive behavior. As I exited the store and got in my car, I was suddenly moved to tears by the feeling that this behavior was all wrong. In that moment I felt that God was trying to tell me something important.

As I reached out to Him in the car, these words from the 23rd Psalm came to mind: "Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me." I'd been praying with this psalm frequently, as I would ponder it while climbing the stairs or waiting for an elevator. I knew that a shepherd would pick up his rod and guide the sheep in the right direction if they began to wander. Shouldn't I be glad, too, when I received such a tap from my Shepherd, God?

The more I thought about this course correction, the more I could see it as a comforting sign of God's care and protection. Deep down, doesn't every wanderer who pleads, "I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments" (Ps. 119:176), feel reassured by the thought of God's direction?

I had no idea that being in these thrift stores was bringing me down so much, but I realized that in frequenting these stores I'd been influenced by thoughts such as unwholesomeness, disarray, and worn-down, worn-out feelings. And as I prayed there in the car to eliminate the influence of these qualities on my thought, I had another revelation.

Since I began studying Christian Science, I have been working to learn not to react to bullying and other provocations, and have been gaining success little by little. I'd always felt it necessary to manage the details of every situation, and as funny as it may seem, that feeling was what made me feel responsible for buying recycled stuff at thrift stores. I felt it was my job to purchase and repurpose other people's castoffs to use in my life. I'd always felt the need to be "doing," or personally addressing whatever was negative in the collective human consciousness. In social situations I would even "recycle" other people's thoughts and opinions as if they were my own. But while recycling is certainly virtuous, I had the unhealthy attitude of feeling like I was personally responsible for all of it!

After the incident in the thrift store, as I prayed to see my true identity as complete and intact, I suddenly saw that I didn't need to cling to an attitude of compulsive personal responsibility. My prayers could change all that. They were an active and powerful tool because the shift in my thought—my understanding that I was being taken care of by God—protected my identity. I couldn't be used as a channel for other people's thoughts and actions.

After this understanding, immediately the need to shop at thrift stores evaporated. The influence on my thought just vanished—I was thrilled to realize that I could simply drive away without feeling the need to come back. And that's exactly what happened. I'm grateful that I no longer have the compulsion to go on these shopping trips, which had become habit-forming and unpleasant. I'm not implying that it's not OK for people to use these stores as resources. It's just not for me anymore.

I'm overwhelmed by the ways God, divine Love, gets our attention and causes us to think and adjust our thoughts and actions. I finally saw that I didn't have to be beholden to a shopping addiction—and even greater than that, that my role in life wasn't to submit to unhealthy influences on my thinking, but to express God's infinite goodness.

Divine Principle uses its power to free us from whatever vise error seems to have us in. Science and Health says it like this: "The power of Christian Science and divine Love is omnipotent" (p. 412). It's so comforting to recognize that this omnipotent power can always reach us where we are and set us on the right path. css