I grew up in a military household where my father's achievements were easily measured by his rank. So the idea of having clearly defined order, purpose, and goals felt natural to me.

But as I got older, and especially after I left a job I loved to care for our first child, Ashley, my own life's purpose didn't feel so easily defined. As I juggled round-the-clock feedings and mounds of laundry, and dealt with exhaustion, I missed the defined responsibilities, structure, and accountability other jobs required. I was happy and grateful to be at home with our daughter, but I felt unmoored.

One afternoon I cried out to God, "I miss my friends, my job, and my paycheck! How can I love my husband and daughter so much and feel so out of place?" Then I thought of this Bible verse: "He hath showed thee ... what is good; and what doth the Lord require of thee, but do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?" (Micah 6:8).

Quickly, I felt calm—brought back to God and to His goodness as the basis of my life. I'd been starting my prayers with me, me, me to find my worth. At that moment—with God and His requirements as the launching pad—I saw that I wasn't some isolated being, desperately trying to get everything right. God was my Father-Mother and would continue to direct me. I realized that my purpose had nothing to do with a job title or being a parent.

Little did I know that the directives in that Bible verse would become the framework of my activities for years to come. Here's how I began to think of them:

"TO DO JUSTLY"

I reasoned that in justice to myself and to my family, I needed to go back to basics, spiritually speaking, in order to understand my role. Since my first visit to a Christian Science Sunday School during high school, I'd loved the idea that we each were created in God's image and likeness, and that God's gift to everyone was "dominion" (see Gen. 1:26, 27).

As a mother, that meant to me that I needed to demand more of myself as God's spiritual creation. I saw that I was purpose-built for soaring—not just coping. Just the idea of being built to soar lifted my spirits. And the more diligent I became about "doing justly," the more evidence I saw of God mothering both me and the baby. For example, as I dedicated myself to finding ways to better structure our day, a schedule naturally came together that made both of us a lot happier.

Also, the "mom-label" took on an expansive new meaning that urged me to take more responsibility for our little acre and neighborhood. At the time, we lived at an intersection that had seen a ten-fold increase in traffic since we'd moved there, resulting in a number of accidents that seemed to increase in severity. While initially I felt victimized, I soon recognized the urgent need for prayer to see God's government in action, meeting the immediate needs of our community.

As a result, one day when a preoccupied driver missed the turn and drove right through our fence, I felt no anger or fear and went out to comfort him.

After we sold that house and moved to another town, we continued to pray for a right resolution for that particular intersection, as our motive in moving was not to escape the problem. Some time later we learned that the intersection had been widened and reconfigured, to the satisfaction and safety of everyone.

My goal to expand my sense of mothering had taken root, because I kept praying to recognize that God's government cannot be stopped from bringing its solutions to meet whatever needs a community may have.

"TO LOVE MERCY"

New friendships and opportunities to be of service to others brought the requirement for me to be willing to forgive and express deep compassion. As I think about that now and consider the events that followed, I can see it was all part of God's plan for me to accept that I was designed to love and to forgive.

When our family moved into a house near a commuter train station, a friend who caught the train to work asked if I would care for her child during the day, since I was at home with my own (now two) children. With her encouragement and interest from other parents, I soon opened a licensed day-care business in the lower level of our house.

During this time, my husband and I agreed to host two exchange students for a month one summer. We'd prayed before accepting, to be sure the idea was God-inspired. It truly felt like another great way to share our home and continue to enrich the lives of our children.

But the afternoon before these two students were to arrive, I received a distressing phone call. I felt hurt and angry. Right after the call, I lost my footing on some stairs and twisted my ankle. Quickly I realized that I couldn't afford the luxury of sitting there nursing hurt feelings, but had to get back to those eager toddlers tugging on my shirt and pants.

God's requirement was to forgive and to love. Despite the pain, by focusing on this requirement I had the courage to stand and get on, and fully engage with the day's activities.

That night, still a bit stiff and uncomfortable, I began to worry about my ability to walk through the airport the next day to meet our student guests. I continued to pray. In addition to recognizing that my identity was God's expression, exempt from pain, I specifically prayed for the assurance that our following God's leading to have these students stay with us couldn't put me at cross-purposes with myself or anyone else.

In the morning, as I was preparing to leave for the airport, I felt a sudden wave of compassion wash over me. The anger and hurt feelings simply vanished. I must have forgotten about my ankle, because later as my husband and I ran to the international terminal to welcome our guests, I realized the pain and stiffness were completely gone, never to return.

The time the students stayed with us not only blessed my family, but our extended family of day-care children and their parents as well.

"TO WALK HUMBLY WITH THY GOD"

In addition to still cherishing my responsibility to do justly and love mercy, I find there are more opportunities than ever to listen humbly for God's guidance. When making choices about my commitments outside the home circle, I've learned that balance is perfectly maintained when I let God direct my choices. And today with two children in college, and one in high school, as I put my hand in His, I ask, "What do You have planned for my children?"

Not long ago my wish to see God's plan for one of our daughters, Caroline, was tested. We were living in the Midwest, and my husband needed to relocate to his company's office on the East Coast. Each family member prayed about our next steps, listening for God's plan. Together we decided to relocate as a family.

But the day before the movers were to arrive, our daughter Caroline asked to stay behind to finish her last year of high school with friends. She'd be staying in student housing at her school, so her safety and well-being weren't in question, but suddenly, my own reasons for moving came into question. I turned humbly to God—I needed to be reassured and comfortable about going without our daughter.

Then I saw that regardless of the love between us, our individual relationship with God meant that my role didn't define her purpose, nor did she have a responsibility or an obligation to support mine. Caroline had turned to God to find her place, and we had to trust her to Him, too. So she stayed for the school year, and we moved. Now, as she finishes her first year of college, she still expresses appreciation for the freedom to make the decision she felt was best at that time. Being able to witness God's ever-unfolding purpose in her life humbles me.

The more I remember to do what the Lord requires of me—to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk with Him—the more I feel the satisfaction and reward of conscious worth. I now know where my accountability lies. It's with God and His purpose for me. He lovingly tends the garden of our lives, and wherever He plants us, I'm convinced that each and every one of us is purpose-built to blossom!

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