Seeing God's goodness in others

Trudy C. Palmer

One of the children in my daughter's preschool developed a reputation for being disruptive and unkind. After a while, my daughter, Gracey, started referring to this child as bad. I was quick to correct her, saying that people sometimes act badly, but they are not bad people. Still I could tell she wasn't convinced. As far as she was concerned, anyone who destroyed her block structure was bad!

I realized that I needed to help Gracey heal this situation. So I told her that the next day she had to see two good things that this child did and report back to me about them. We also talked about the verse from Habakkuk that says of God, "Thou art of purer eyes than to behold evil" (1:13). I assured her that, as God's reflection, she, too, could see so purely that she saw only good.

That afternoon, when I picked Gracey up from school, she had not only the required two good things to report but an extra one as well. We talked about the fact that, in spotting this child's goodness, she was seeing the way God sees. Then I told her that she had to notice three good things about this child the next day. Again she came home with those three points and a bonus one. We continued in this manner until she got up to noticing ten good things about this child in one day.

By this time Gracey recognized that a transformation had taken place. I asked her what she'd noticed happening when she saw the good this child expressed. She responded, "Then there isn't any bad." And so it has remained. Gracey and this child get along quite well now and play together often. And as far as I can tell, this other child's overall demeanor in the classroom is much more loving and helpful than it had been before.

What's more, Gracey so enjoyed this activity that she asked to continue the exercise, broadening the scope to include everyone in the class. So now the last thing I do before kissing her goodbye in the morning is to whisper in her ear a classmate's name and the number of good things she is to notice. She grins broadly as I whisper; then that night she tells me in great detail the number of good things that person did during the day.

What did I learn? That I should be as eager as Gracey is to know others the way God knows them.

Trudy C. Palmer
Medford, Massachusetts

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