What is serving church all about? This question had never concerned me—until a few years ago when, for the first time, I began learning the meaning of church membership. Church activity involves grappling with spiritual truths in a way that removes the stranger to Truth in ourselves, helps us to understand God more clearly, and reveals our relationship with church members—with everyone—as brothers and sisters.

The spiritual growth that comes from devotedly serving church gives us the ability to better face challenges and limitations. You might say God supports us by way of our church membership. This understanding of the potential of church is tremendously invigorating.

I had been a member of The Mother Church as well as of a branch Church of Christ, Scientist, for twenty years or so. But quite frankly, my activity in church was little more than lip service to the essence of the activity. Then I switched my membership to a branch church close to my home and was quickly appointed clerk of this branch. I was jubilant to serve as a new member and as clerk, but I had no idea how serving in church would change my life.

At this time, I was in a relationship with a man who I thought would be my mate for life. We were not legally married, but considered ourselves to be married under common law. The reason for this arrangement was my resistance to legal marriage. I was not completely sure why I resisted, but I did.

A friend, who also attended my new branch church, brought to my attention that this situation was not in keeping with the By-Laws in the Manual of The Mother Church. In particular, Mary Baker Eddy writes: "No person shall be a member of this Church who claims a spiritually adopted child or a spiritually adopted husband or wife. There must be legal adoption and legal marriage, which can be verified according to the laws of our land" (Art. VIII, Sect. 20). She also writes, "If a Christian Scientist is to be married, the ceremony shall be performed by a clergyman who is legally authorized" (Art. IX, Sect. 1).

Obviously, I was not following either admonition and resisted my friend's counsel. I discussed the issue with the First Reader of our church and agreed to ask a Christian Science pracititioner for help with the situation. At first I resisted even this idea, but the sense of love and rightness expressed by the First Reader encouraged me.

As the practitioner prayed with me and shared ideas, I began to catch glimpses of the importance of adhering to the Manual's injunctions. She helped me to understand that they were written out of love for me and for the protection of each church member. I did not immediately realize how these Rules were specifically protecting me, but I felt somehow they were. In time, as I became more earnest in obeying the Manual, I saw its provisions in terms of God's spiritual law of goodness being made manifest humanly. It soon became clear to me that the individual with whom I was living was not someone who would deeply support my spiritual growth as a Christian Scientist. I began to see that the protection in those Manual provisions allowed me to face my long-standing resistance to marriage and to realize that I wasn't ready for marriage. As a result, I looked to God for deeper meaning in my relationship with Him.

I think the reason I had not been ready for marriage is that I was expecting a man to bring me joy. The motive was incorrect. That's why I did not feel true joy in the idea of a legal marriage. In looking to God, I asked to see the right motive for marriage. I soon realized that marriage, in its highest sense, continually improves how we see our relation to God. When we feel a genuine, spiritual love for our spouse, we reflect God's love for man.

Trusting a joy that comes from a material, personal source can at best give us only temporary satisfaction. But when we see God as the supplier of good we have everlasting fulfillment. We see that the good that seems to be coming to us from our spouse is actually coming from man's reflection of God.

Additionally, I began to see that being principled in obeying the impartial Rules in the Manual was requisite in order wholeheartedly and honestly to serve Church as defined in its spiritual sense by Mrs. Eddy as "the structure of Truth and Love; whatever rests upon and proceeds from divine Principle" (Science and Health, p. 583). After realizing this and taking steps to demonstrate it, I began to witness in my own life the promised results Mrs. Eddy says come from obeying the Manual By-Laws—increased spirituality and an invigorated capacity "to heal the sick, to comfort such as mourn, and to awaken the sinner" (The First Church of Christ, Scientist, and Miscellany, p. 230).

A remarkable transformation came about in my life. Within five weeks I had ended the relationship with this man, and I began life anew safely in an awareness of being in the arms of God. I was learning to trust God moment by moment, not wondering or worrying about tomorrow or the next day. I found a new residence within twenty-four hours of this decision and was able to stay with church members until my new home was ready.

In placing my trust in spiritual law, I was trusting God's, Principle's, perfect order, never erring, in control of man and the universe. Devotion to spiritual law is our constant yielding to His government. It is demonstrated in our lives by right activity—activity undertaken for the purpose of serving God.

I can see now that I was seeking my own inherent need for "right" activity when I took the clerk job. And my dear fellow church members had seen my need to be obedient to Principle before I had, and had unconditionally loved me without condemnation or judgment. I cannot imagine where I would be now if they had judged me and "written me off" because of my actions. God's love, expressed through them, held me patiently in His embrace, waiting for my realization of Truth—and my healing.

When I look at the last couple of years since I joined this church, I realize just how different my life has become—embodying a newness and joy. Joy that feels real; true joy that comes from following God's will.

This newness is clearly the result of the activity of Church with respect to its human mission. The definition of Church in Science and Health continues, "The Church is that institution, which affords proof of its utility and is found elevating the race, rousing the dormant understanding from material beliefs to the apprehension of spiritual ideas and the demonstration of divine Science, thereby casting out devils, or error, and healing the sick" (p. 583).

Sometimes people wonder, Why get involved in church work? For me, the answer is clear. How could I not want church work in my life? How could I not desire the daily ascension that steadily occurs from embracing the true essence of Church?