I had been a student of Christian Science for twenty-two years and...

Dorothy McManus

I had been a student of Christian Science for twenty-two years and during that time I had never been greatly agitated by the disturbances of mortal mind. In fact, life had been most pleasant and acceptable. Then, without any forewarning, came the challenge to stand firm in this Science in a question regarding God's spiritual creation, for I was notified that my youngest son, who was serving as a Peace Corps volunteer in the Philippine Islands, had suddenly passed on. The effect this news had on me can be described by Mary Baker Eddy's words in "Retrospection and Introspection" (p. 23): "Matter was no longer spanned with its rainbow of promise. The world was dark. The oncoming hours were indicated by no floral dial. The senses could not prophesy sunrise or starlight." But through the prayerful work of a practitioner and supported by relatives and friends, I began to walk step by step out of this abyss of darkness into the light.

Still, one of the most insidious suggestions that persisted in disturbing my sense of peace was a false belief regarding time. How desperately I would think, "Oh, to be able to turn back time or reach into it to that point when I can be reunited with this loved one!" But what about the interim? Should I wait out time in order to be happy and joyful again? I knew intuitively that this would mean being subservient to time rather than having dominion over it. As a result, I began a deep and consecrated study of the concept of "now" rather than continuing to dwell on the false concept of time.

In the Glossary of "Science and Health, with Key to the Scriptures" by Mrs. Eddy we read that time means "mortal measurements; limits, in which are summed up all human acts, thoughts, beliefs, opinions, knowledge; matter; error" (p. 595). In conjunction with this line of reasoning, I turned completely to God, divine Love, who holds us always in His grasp. Thus I was led to bring to each moment the fullness of God's purpose in fruitage and productivity. Shortly afterward, I was elected First Reader of a branch church, and in this capacity there has come to me a recognition of the higher spiritual joys of service. There also has come an understanding of this poignant lesson (Retrospection and Introspection, p. 31): "The loss of material objects of affection sunders the dominant ties of earth and points to heaven."

It is with deep gratitude that I can testify not only to this healing of grief but to innumerable healings of various kinds within my household, such as those of hay fever, headaches, colds, and burns, as well as to the experience in many instances of divine guidance and protection.

In deep humility I wish to express my gratitude for God, our Father-Mother, whose loving presence is ever near, for Christ Jesus, our Way-shower, and for Mrs. Eddy, whose unselfish service to mankind has enabled us to build upon the solid rock of Truth and to secure ourselves from being tossed about by the winds of mortal mind.

(Mrs.) Dorothy McManus, El Centro, California

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