Testimony of Healing October 17, 1953 Issue

I am grateful to be able to express...

Sonia E. Modine

I am grateful to be able to express gratitude to God. For several years I attended Wednesday testimony meetings in a Church of Christ, Scientist, and thought how wonderful it was for so many people to have so much to be grateful for. At the same time, however, I tearfully thought, "But what have I to be grateful for?" My life at that period was like a virtual hell, completely miserable. I knew that some day Christian Science would be the only religion for me; but I was not ready to live in accord with it then. However, my awakening did finally come, and I became an earnest student of the Bible and the Christian Science textbook, "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" by Mary Baker Eddy, eagerly studying the weekly Lesson-Sermons found in the Christian Science Quarterly. Life then became worth living.

Later I found that Mrs. Eddy defines "hell" in part as "self-imposed agony" (Science and Health, p. 588). At first I resented this definition, because I thought surely I had not asked for all the misery that was mine. At last I realized that it was self-imposed because I had accepted it. I then pondered Mrs. Eddy's definition of "heaven" (ibid., p. 587): "Harmony; the reign of Spirit; government by divine Principle; spirituality; bliss; the atmosphere of Soul."

Gradually through these Christianly scientific explanations of heaven and hell I began to see what Christ Jesus meant when he said, "The kingdom of heaven is at hand" (Matt. 10:7). From then on I began accepting only good and rejecting all else. The first evil to fall away was smoking; then social drinking was discontinued, and a truer sense of friendship was established. Many of my physical healings came easily in comparison to the reformation of my character, which was quite a struggle. I am so grateful to Mrs. Eddy for her statement in "Miscellaneous Writings" (p. 107), "Without a knowledge of his sins, and repentance so severe that it destroys them, no person is or can be a Christian Scientist." This experience, which improved my character, was followed by membership in The Mother Church and a branch church. I am extremely grateful for this privilege. Later Christian Science upheld and comforted me at the passing of two dear ones. This Science is indeed the Comforter which Christ Jesus promised would come, for it reveals the eternality of Life that makes separation impossible.

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