As a little child I was several times considered dangerously ill. As I grew older and gained more of self-possession, I passed a few years free from sickness, but was led to believe that I had more ambition than strength, and as a rule would be too tired to sleep for some time after going to bed. I was told not to play so hard. Passing on in years play changed to work, and the claim of overwork was presented and finally believed. However, energy and ambition prevailed over everything but fear of consequences; when this fear held possession the body was laid low for a time.

Pain, weakness, etc., could cause suffering, but could not hold me down, and for years my going about, work, etc., was done with limbs trembling under me. Every exertion meant exhaustion that seemed very near to death. Doctors declared I could never be strong; that it was not in me. By careful perusal of various treatises and conversation with different doctors, each giving a different theory, various forms of disease were developed and found no cure, until for years I never was free from suffering of some sort. The world seemed a place of misery and suffering, life a burden and mystery, the what and why of things a question never answered, yet faith believed all would be made clear some time. Many times one with a little different disposition would have stepped over the narrow line called death. But I never wanted to die; I wanted to know. I believed Christian ought to heal as Jesus did, but how?

Looking back now I can see where Bible thoughts often restored me to health, that is, to comparative health; raised me up from conscious danger to where I could go on for a time. Loss and sorrow were added as time went on. Looking out upon the world from this standpoint it seemed a pitiful condition that humanity was in. This led me to try to forget my sorrow and suffering, to try to be cheerful and brighten the world for others as I could.

I went into the Orthodox church, not because I found one in which I could fully believe, but because the church taught belief in God and was on His side, while the world was not. Finally I heard of Christian Science in November, 1886. What I heard was of the miraculous healing of an old lady whom I had known for years. This was talked of everywhere. I felt very glad for her, but was so resigned to my own condition that it never occurred to me that I, too, could be healed, until the following February.

One Sunday I had gone to my Methodist church and the sense of weakness made me look longingly at a hard, bare floor. Oh, if only I could lie down on it! Then came the thought, Why not go to the Christian Scientists? they cannot more than kill me. Instantly the resolve was made to go the next day, and the next day, February 8, 1886, I went.

It was the day of my new birth,—my birthday, it has always seemed to me since. I had a fear that it might be mesmerism, so asked a few questions, for that was a thing I would have nothing to do with. It was naturally repellant, though not understood. The answer satisfied me. I asked for and received treatment. Then a few more questions came and were answered, and I began to see. But friends had passed away and this way was different, so I asked, "If this is true and right, how is it with those who have lived and died in the old way?" Very quietly she said, "They were doing the best they knew, they are that far on the way."

I realized then what it meant to "remove mountains." I could not put into words the joy that came with those words. For one little space of time I stood silent, then my joy found expression in these words, "It's the Truth! Whether I am ever healed or not, I know it's the Truth. It seems just what I've always been looking for."

I left the house in that thought,—It's the Truth! It's the Truth! When I did remember the body, I found it uncomplaining,—no pain, no weakness, no weight,—it wanted to go hip-a-to-hop, and for a long time I was really afraid of doing something of the sort, something that might make a grown-up woman look absurd, and so reflect upon Christian Science, for it was now my first love. I rode home not a bit tired,—such a marvel—when for years riding had been a misery and often impossible. That evening, after riding about twenty miles, I found myself sleepy for the first time in years, but not tired. I had to tell it, and I kept going to the mirror, it seemed to me I surely must look different. I got laughed at of course, but who could care for that when they had just found the Truth? Days passed on,—I was doing hard work,—every moment a joy,—I felt like a child.

Then I began to crave understanding, but how to get it? I had not then heard of any book that taught it. This longing grew so that I went again to see the Christian Scientist, only to find she had gone home. Then another came and I went inquiring and was told of "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures," which later on I purchased.

I looked at it with such a helpless feeling, and asked, "How shall I begin?" The Christian Scientist said, "Just read it." I did very little but read. Housework never was done so quickly, and the best of the reading was I began to see how to use it. Before the book was half read I had proven its teachings true in several ways. Very much to my own surprise I found that I could heal. I expected that sometime,—when I had gained much understanding,—I might hope to use it for others, but that the little I knew could so demonstrate it was wonderful. I simply declared what Science and Health said was true of disease, and realized what it said about God. I did what I was asked to do because I recalled the parable of talents, how the one who buried his talent lost it. I always said, "I will try. It cannot hurt you," and it took away the hurt.

In all these years Christian Science has been Truth to me, and has kept me through many places that seemed hard, places that evil had conspired to make hard, and in all these fourteen years there has never been a day that I have not been able to do all that duty required. I have done the hardest, heaviest work, such work as is usually considered far beyond a woman's strength and my day's work away from home has sometimes been seventeen hours long, besides morning and evening work at home. Gradually the hard places have been made easier, and the realization of what constitutes life has made all things more harmonious. The healing, mentally and physically, has gone on for myself and others. Moral and physical strength has increased, and a new heaven and earth have appeared, all from the teachings of this one "little book," Science and Health, until now, looking back, I give thanks for what Christian Science did for me, and what it is doing for many more.