Renewal and healing in my life
There have been many occasions when I’ve experienced healing from quiet moments of communion with God.
For instance, early last year I began having intermittent pain in one ear, especially when I was chewing. I was tempted to fear that my prayers would not be sufficient to meet this challenge, but I endeavored to listen more closely to God for divine Love’s healing ideas. Eventually I realized that for months I had been preoccupied with asking God for the human answers I felt I needed to guide my career, rather than truly listening to—and being guided by—the divine Mind, or one intelligence, that sees and blesses all. The willingness to yield to Mind’s ideas moment by moment involved giving up personal views of how my career should unfold and trusting God’s plan for me. When wanting to know and do God’s will became the motive of my prayers, the pain dissolved. And I was blessed at my job, too, as my manager offered me a more suitable way to advance through improving my performance.
Several years earlier, family and financial circumstances had forced me to move from the family home I had lived in for 16 years. During a summer yard sale, I saw many of my favorite belongings being sold and taken away. It was as if the life I had known was coming to an end. But at the same time, I felt a sense of renewal, again through quiet moments with God. During these moments I sought a deeper understanding of God as my ever-present guide and eternal Life, the provider of all the good that exists, from which we can never be separated.
I also gained great comfort from the Scriptures, which reveal God’s promises—such as, “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10, New International Version).
The aforementioned yard sale took place about a month after my mother’s passing. In the interim, I spent a few weeks in another state with a younger sister and her husband. This dear sister offered me a place in her home to live, if I wanted to relocate.
One day I borrowed her vehicle so I could drive to a scenic spot nearby and consider my path forward. As I was driving, I had a strange feeling of not being connected to anything on earth. Then came a thought, seemingly out of nowhere, that also felt so foreign to me: I didn’t have to stay on earth—I could join my mother and other relatives who had passed. On the heels of that suggestion came a counteracting thought—one that I immediately recognized as an angel message from God—telling me to not pay attention to this lie that death would solve the issue of where I belonged. God, Life, is real, and death is unreal, an illusion of the material senses, “the last enemy that shall be destroyed” (I Corinthians 15:26), something to be resisted, and not a friend. I made a choice to resist the lie and stay awake to the indestructibility of Life and of God’s idea, or expression.
After the visit with my sister, it seemed that temporarily moving in with her was the best next step, since we had made the decision to rent out our mother’s home. I made plans to ship my car to her city and started looking at airline flights.
At that point, it seemed to me that I needed to take the time to really listen to God and be certain it was my Father-Mother’s plan for me to move to my sister’s. In Christian Science, listening to God includes acknowledging our God-given ability to know whatever we need to know and to feel the deep peace that accompanies a right decision.
A few days earlier, a family friend had contacted me, and over dinner she mentioned that I might consider restarting a former line of work. She told me of some training for this work that was near my mother’s former house and would start in a few weeks, and she offered to rent me a room in her home at a price I could afford.
As I again thought about her offer, the deep peace I felt told me that this was the answer to my prayer to do God’s will. I canceled the appointment for shipping my car, and was at that training session the next month.
By winter I had found affordable new housing and a new job only about a hundred miles away. The peace I felt was so palpable that it inspired me to stay more attuned to God’s angel thoughts, not just at church or at chosen moments during the day, but moment by moment. It has been awesome to witness the many ways I have been blessed by God’s mothering through hearing and following Her “still small voice” (I Kings 19:12). Doing so does not leave us in a suffering state; it helps us move through the suffering and heals whatever in our lives needs healing.
San Diego, California, US