I was a refugee at thirteen
Luam Teame Adhanom is a 16-year-old from Eritrea, a country on the eastern coast of Africa. From 1998 to 1999, Eritrea was at war with its neighbor, Ethiopia, because of a border dispute. During this time Luam had to leave her home, her family, and friends, for a new life in the United States, in Boston. The Herald had the following interview with Luam.
Can you tell us something about your life in Eritrea?
Life was much easier there. It's not that I don't like it here, but it's hard to live without your parents. I used to talk to my parents if I had a problem, but I didn't know much about God. No one in my family was religious; however we believed in only one God and followed the Ten Commandments. I really started thinking about who God is when I began going to a Christian Science Sunday School in the US.
What made you want to come to the United States?
The war between Eritrea and Ethiopia. I lived with my stepmother and my father in Ethiopia. When the war began, both of my biological parents were taken to jail because they were fighters for Eritrea. I stayed with my stepmother. The Ethiopian government deported us to Eritrea — my stepmother, my two half-siblings, and me. My brother was 4 and my sister was 2 years old. In Eritrea we lived at my stepmother's parents' house. She didn't have a husband to support her and didn't have a job. After a year she couldn't take care of three kids at the same time and told me it would be better if I came to America. When I left, she told me I wouldn't be returning.
I was 13 years old then. I have lived here with my aunt since then, and I don't even know if my parents are alive.
Did you know your aunt?
I had seen her twice, when she visited us in Eritrea. I only knew that she was my aunt, and lived in the US with her husband and kids.
How did you feel when you went to school?
I couldn't fit in at my school or with the other kids from Eritrea who live here. I just felt that other teenagers were better than I was because they had been here their whole life. When they didn't say "Hi," I thought they ignored me because I was not American.
When did you begin to feel better?
The things I learned in Sunday School helped me out a lot. The teacher told me that everybody is a perfect son or daughter of God. Then I understood that the other kids weren't feeling they were better than I was. They were just being themselves. It was I who had to cross the line, and not be shy. I didn't need to make a big effort to fit in. And that worked. Even my cousins started talking to me. I couldn't speak English and they don't speak Tigrinya. I thought if I tried to speak English, they were going to laugh at me. And they thought if they spoke Tigrinya, I was going to laugh at them. So we didn't say anything to each other — just "hi" and "bye."
Why did you keep coming to Sunday School?
Because it made me more confident. First, I thought I couldn't learn anything at school. English and history were really hard for me. I had to read books and write essays and all that stuff. And I couldn't focus on what I was doing.
One day my Sunday School teacher, Lanny, gave me a story to read about this girl who was really good in English. When she had to write a paper and didn't have a clue about what to write, she prayed and got a good idea.
I used to get nervous every time I had to take a test, and forget what I studied. So I started thinking that with God's help I could do anything. And when I was doing my midterms or my final exams I thought about that. And it really worked. Only then did I realize that there was a real God, who is everywhere — ready to help me.
I also learned how to be nice to others, not just expect others to be nice to me. You have to treat people the way you want to be treated. If you're nice to them, they'll be nice to you.
How were your grades in school?
At first, I got bad grades. The Sunday School teacher and staff helped me a lot to realize that God was everywhere — and that I could ask Him for help. Then my grades went up really fast. I went from a D to a B, just like that.
And I still keep on having good grades. I started doing good things, not just fooling around. My teachers began to believe in me, and to support me in what I was doing. If I asked them for help after school, they would stay after school to help me. As a result, I got on the honor roll. And I also got a perfect attendance award.
What is the most important thing you learned in Sunday School?
That God is my dad and my mom. Even though I can't see Him, God is always there when I need Him. If I'm at the library until late, and it's dark, I might get a little scared. But then I remember that God is with me and there is nothing to worry about. So my fear goes away.
Do you pray for your parents?
Yes. I pray so that they can be safe. I pray so that I can see them someday. Sometimes it's hard to believe that they might be alive. But I realize that God is there for me and He is also there for anyone in the world. God is helping my parents.
What would you say to another teenager that might be dealing with the problems that you had?
I would say that everybody should be confident in himself or herself, and work harder. Whatever the problem might be, there is a bright light that shines uninterruptedly. When you see it, a problem is just a little thing that bothers you, but that light can remove it.
