Being in the senior play was my dream, and now here I was on the stage, trying out for this popular production. I had memorized the lines of the part I wanted and practiced them for hours. I was one of two finalists. As it turned out, the other girl fit the part perfectly and was chosen. The disappointment was devastating. For me, there would never be another senior play. My dream would never come true. I was eighteen and desperately trying to be a good sport. Tears welled up inside as I fought their presence. Quickly I left to go home. 

I’d prayed for the opportunity to be in the play. Now it seemed as if my prayers had gone unanswered. I turned to God with all my heart, trusting that He would provide answers and help me overcome my unhappiness. I knew God loved me. He also loved the girl who was given the part. If it was right for her, there would be something else fulfilling for me to do. I realized that not everything in life was about me or what I wanted. It was about God and what I could do to serve Him—how I could express more of my God-given spiritual individuality and glorify Him. 

My desire hadn’t been for personal glory; it was to feel I was part of the senior play activity and to be on stage and act. As I prayed to let go of human will, I was able to open my thought to serve on the makeup committee. This took humility and more God-centered thinking. I let go of what I wanted and focused on what I could do to be helpful to others. It was actually fun putting on makeup, and I enjoyed being backstage with my friends. I fought the temptation to feel deprived of my dream and gratefully contributed all I could. I enjoyed seeing the excitement and success of the actors.

After the play was over, our drama teacher told me that he knew how much I had wanted to be in the production. He said he appreciated my attitude and that he respected me for the way I had handled the situation. This surprised me. I didn’t realize that anyone was aware of my inner struggles. It somehow made everything OK. I thanked God for helping me to express love toward others. Looking back, I can see that this experience helped me turn from a self-centered to a God-centered outlook, and allowed me to find a deeper sense of accomplishment and purpose. I gained far more than I lost.

In Retrospection and Introspection Mary Baker Eddy states: “The loss of material objects of affection sunders the dominant ties of earth and points to heaven. Nothing can compete with Christian Science, and its demonstration, in showing this solemn certainty in growing freedom and vindicating ‘the ways of God’ to man” (p. 31).

A few years later I got a job as a drama counselor at a camp for Christian Scientists. My experience with makeup and production aspects of a play helped me find success in this position. In the years since that time, my love of acting has enabled me to excel in numerous ways. Bringing stories alive when reading to my children has been a joy. I love making Bible stories come to life when teaching Sunday School. Also, putting on puppet plays and talent shows for over twenty years has been more than rewarding.

I’ve found that no right desire is unfulfilled if we understand that satisfaction, in the deepest, truest sense, does not come from material accomplishments but from spiritual growth. As Christ Jesus taught, “Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness” (Matthew 6:33). 

If our desire is to express God’s pure, loving nature more fully and to do His will with humility, we won’t be disappointed. Things don’t always turn out in the way we plan. But when our prayer is to serve God and to accept His will, we’ll be blessed with the spirit of giving, and that will be expressed in ways more wonderful than we could imagine.

The Bible tells us that Joseph was taken away from his home and sold into slavery. One could imagine that everything he had hoped for as a child might have seemed unattainable as he found himself in a foreign country without the people he loved, without the likelihood of ever returning home. Yet he didn’t let this plight take away his integrity and his love for God. Joseph’s moral courage enabled him to stand firmly—trusting God in the face of incredible odds. And as he did so, he was recognized and admired in important ways.

Each apparent setback opened up new opportunities for him to utilize his talents until he was given the highest position in Egypt, second only to Pharaoh. This enabled him to save multitudes from famine, including his own family (see Genesis, chaps. 37, 39—50).

Christian Science points us away from the appearance of man as material—as mortal, limited, subject to chance, deprived of good—and opens our thought to the truth of man as the very image of God (see Genesis 1:27), spiritual and forever blessed. In Rudimental Divine Science Mrs. Eddy states: “According to the evidence of the so-called physical senses, man is material, fallen, sick, depraved, mortal. Science and spiritual sense contradict this, and they afford the only true evidence of the being of God and man, the material evidence being wholly false ” (p. 7).

As we understand that life is actually God-governed, spiritual, and unlimited in goodness, we’re inclined to dream less and to place more trust in God rather than in narrowly outlined human plans. Every experience, no matter how difficult or unfair it may seem to be, is an opportunity for us to grow closer to God and His purpose for us. When our primary desire is for spiritual growth and healing, we will not be disheartened by setbacks in life because we will find that all of our genuine needs are cared for by God, and we make progress in living a life of unselfed love in service to God and man.

Mary Baker Eddy’s poem “Christ My Refuge” concludes: 

That kind of prayer will always be answered and satisfy our true desires.